Last year, Authors United, a group of professional writers—by their own definition the most prestigious one ever assembled!—managed to write the very worst persuasive essay I’d ever seen.
Some of you are no doubt too busy to read all that, so once again, I’ll give you a quick rundown of the whole kerfuffle.
AUTHORS UNITED: America!
AMAZON: You again? We’re trying to work here.
AUTHORS UNITED: You’re a monopoly! And a monopsony!
AMAZON: If you’re a Prime member, we can get a dictionary to your house in two days. Better yet, we have them available for Kindle!
AUTHORS UNITED: You’re blocking the sale of books!
AMAZON: How’s that?
AUTHORS UNITED: Because you sell too many of the books!
AUTHORS UNITED: And you try to sell more of your own products than ours! And you don’t do ANYTHING to foster competition!
AUTHORS UNITED: And if those poor pathetic self publishers don’t price their books how you say, you cut their royalties!
AMAZON: You mean, we cut them down to an only slightly higher percentage than you get all the time, instead of a way way higher one?
(INDIE AUTHORS: Please leave us out of this.)
AUTHORS UNITED: You have to do what we want, because culture! We are the only source of books and the only means of free expression!
AMAZON: Are not.
AUTHORS UNITED: FREE EXPRESSION!
AMAZON: We agree.
AUTHORS UNITED: The DOJ will hear about this!
AMAZON: We love those guys. Tell them we said hi.
Here’s the thing, and I said this last time I blogged mean about AU: I really don’t like blogging mean, honest I don’t. But I feel compelled to respond when they behave this badly, and so deliberately pursue their own self-interest while pretending to be motivated by nothing but altruism and apple pie and the children. It’s so disappointing to see in people I’ve read and enjoyed and in many cases, admired. And as you can see by this one paragraph, if I play it straight it just turns into a boring lecture.